When does it get easier? When do I stop questioning everything, and accept that our Heavenly Father took our little miracle for a reason? When do I stop being angry and just accept that I wasn't meant to have him on Earth? I was used in the Lord's plan, yet I feel so selfish because I am the one who wanted him!
The babies turned 3 months yesterday, and it has been 3 months today since our baby boy left us.
Dear Mommy,
I know how much you love me, And I know how much you care. I know you are still wishing that I were still there. I know this day is hard for you, And I know you will probally cry, And God knows your hurting too, he understands just why, for he gave his son, so I could be an angel in the sky. I wish I could be there to wipe away your tears. But I am up here with Jesus now. And in some future year, we will all be together, and there will be no more tears. And we will get to know each other just like we wanted to. But for now, just know I love you. And Jesus loves you too. My Father here in Heaven wathces over me for you.
I love you little man!!!
5 comments:
That was so sweet. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings!
I know that we will have the chance to know and love him like we would have on earth. Thank you again.
You and Ryder are a blessing for all of us.
I know how hard it must be. I'm sure it helps to express your thoughts. Thanks for sharing! We think of you and your family everyday. I know that Ryder is watching over everyone of you and loving you always. You are such a blessing to all of us. Stay strong! We Love Ya!
I can't even begin to imagine what you must go through. I think you said it perfectly when you said how do you celebrate each day and yet mourn each day. London sure is beautiful and I know Ryder is a handsome little one watching over you and your family. Thinking of you!!
Oh wow, Courtney you are amazing! You really inspire me to be strong and faithful. I think you are doing everything exactly right...you should celebrate London while remembering Ryder. They will always be connected and you are forever their mommy.
Hi Courtney, London's Christmas picture looks so cute! I'll keep praying for you, as I can't imagine the highs and lows you experience having one baby and missing one so much. I hope you had a wonderful Holiday! Take Care
Hannah McLaughlin
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